Almost There

Many of you who follow my blog know that I am a counselor and that I have been working towards clinical licensure for quite some time. It has been a long, long process made so much harder by chronic pain. And it’s hard to believe that after so many long years, this process is about to come to an end.

Out of the 3000 hours of counseling I am required to log to meet the requirements for licensure, I have only 18 left. Just 18! I can’t even believe it. Ever since the beginning of January, I have been counting down the hours, one by one. And now I’m almost there.

I honestly have no idea how I will feel the day I finish. Will I be in shock? Elated? Will I cry? Will it feel just like any other day? I don’t know.

It feels both huge and anticlimactic at the same time. I’ve been working towards this for so long that it is hard to imagine life without this goal looming in my future. Once I finish, what will life be like? What will I work towards then? Will life feel different or the same?

Reaching this goal feels so, so much bigger to me than it would if chronic pain hadn’t colored the whole process. Every single step to get to this place was a fight. It took me seven years to make it here, when on average it takes most people about four years. There was a long period of time in the middle of those seven years when I was only able to work 2-3 hours a week. During that time, I wasn’t sure I would finish before the deadline. Even now, I am holding my breath, hoping that nothing happens in these last few weeks to derail everything.

And I’m still processing it all. I am sure I will have more to say once my final hours are completed. Once I send in the application, and hopefully, receive confirmation that everything was accepted.

This summer I will have a chance to breathe. Well, that and take care of all those things I have been neglecting…doctor’s appointments, PT, a hair cut, dentist appointments, etc… All those things that got pushed to the side when there were more important things to worry about.

For so long I have put almost my whole self, every last drop of my energy, towards work. What will it be like to not do that anymore? I am so looking forward to having a more balanced life.

My greatest hope is that my body will have a chance to do some recovering when it’s not pushed to work as much. But even if not, just any sort of break will be nice.

I know I have been a little bit absent on the blog and not kept up with the schedule I set for myself to post every Tuesday. Basically, I decided that blog schedules are not for me. But, over this summer, I anticipate being around a little more. Likely I will be writing a few more posts and also sharing a few projects I am working on.

All of you who read my blog – I think of you often. I really do. This blog and the people I met through it have played a huge part in helping me reach my goals. Just knowing about others in similar or worse situations than my own who still move forward day after day has given me courage to keep going. I don’t know how I would have made it if I hadn’t met so many others walking this same road as me. Thank you to each and every one of you!

10 Comments

  1. We think of you often as well. We pray for you and for your goals. May God graciously answer this particular One. Looking forward to your next post, when Lord willing you have more wonderful news to share with us.

  2. Oh dear Esther, you bring tears of joy to my eyes with your post!! You deserve this so much. I was getting worried I’d not seen an update about those hours but you’ve come through. You are amazing and yes yes yes celebrate and let the freedom overcome you when you get your confirmation. Reminds me of the night we moved in our new house, I cried because I couldn’t believe we’d done it and I was finally going to be safe after years of slowly wasting away. You’ll remember that moment when things get tough so enjoy and breathe it in.

    Ok sorry now I will sound like a nagging nanny (lol) but please do refrain from any risky chores till those hours are in the bank, better put whatever else on hold than miss this. I’ve missed some important events before because I thought I could do that one thing and regretted how silly I was when I had to miss out something so important over a mere detail.

    And who knows, maybe you’ll get even more hours in before the deadline just in case someone made a mistake somewhere that would reduce your hours (unless that’s not an issue once they’ve signed on the hours already).
    Invest in registered mail too lol Best investment ever when sending official papers in, and a stress relief when you see the delivery details online. And that was it for nanny Claudia;)
    Oh and party away!

    1. Thank you so much Claudia! And those are two great pieces of advice – no overdoing it and using registered mail. I will be doing both of those thing! Thanks for looking out for me 🙂

  3. I am a newcomer recently to your sight, having stumbled upon it through Pinterest. I was impressed and your post resonated deep within. I thought to myself, “Ah, a kindred spirit.”

    I rejoice with you, Esther, as you reach this long anticipated goal! From one counselor to another, CONGRATS!! I know those long hours, but was blessed to have obtained mine years before being hit with the game changer of Fibromyalgia. I know that my return to school to get my MSW was God’s calling on my life and never looked back or regretted it for a moment, and thankful of His timing of that in hindsight!

    I have had a varied and wonderful professional life over the years and due to my no longer being able to work full-time due to Fibro, I have worked to provide grief education and support to those who have lost a loved one through a ministry focused funeral home for the past 15 years now. I have been very blessed to be able to work part-time and the majority from my home office to give me the flexibility my body requires.

    I am happy for your accomplishments and certainly know our world needs more good Christian counselors in it!! Savor the moment, take it all in and give God the glory for giving you the strength and preserverence to accomplish this milestone in your life!

    I will continue to pray for you and cheer you on, and I look forward to reading more of your blog over the summer as I can catch the moments to do so. God bless you in all that you set your heart to do in His will and may He prosper you in the days ahead with strength, peace and grace as the next part of your journey unfolds before you. This is an exciting time for you, to be sure. Thanks for sharing it with us!

    Blessings!

    1. Hi Leigh! It’s so encouraging to hear from another counselor. That’s great you have been able to work from home and still continue counseling after your fibromyalgia diagnosis. Thanks so much for stopping by <3

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